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Clear Perspectives in View of the End
Dear Friends,
I confess that I write this letter under pressure of a deadline. One benefit such pressure provides for me is a clarifying effect. The realization that I have very little time to complete my task sobers me with the realization that one day I will have only moments remaining in my earthly pilgrimage. From that perspective, people see with stunning clarity the difference between what is trash and what is treasure in their lives. If I had an hour left to live, what thoughts would occupy me?
If that hour were this hour, I would regret the time I wasted judging others and justifying myself. It is woefully easy for me to employ my strong critical capacity in my finding the defects in others and seeking to correct them. Would that I had heeded more vitally the warning of our Lord regarding the log in my eye. But I have been too busy obsessing over the speck in the eyes of others.
I would regret the time I have wasted doubting God and setting myself up as a judge of His wise and loving providences in my life. I have for decades marveled at and admired the faith, gratitude, and love of Paul and Silas as they sang God’s praises in their Philippian dungeon. Yet, I have allowed myself to be pre-occupied with what I regard to be the uncaring if not unjust appearances of the Lord’s dealings with me. I would have done well to remember that wisdom and love are vindicated by their fruits, not by the roots and branches of their sometimes painful dealings with me. Could I not have sooner seen that the fruit of God’s Holy Spirit in my life has been growing not from my desires being gratified so much as their being tested by my Lord’s delays or even denials?
I would regret my tendency to control people and circumstances. How did I ever get the notion that I could be a competent lord over others, treating them like ignorant and wayward children, if not like my slaves? I am now and would be in my last hour of life heartily thankful for the countless times the Lord has convicted me of my rationalizing my own deluded despotism and raw thuggery, as I have tried to pass them off as aspects of holy zeal.
My assessment would not be only regrets, of course, as I have been and continue increasingly to be conscious of the manifold blessings that God has showered upon me. Yet even with such great blessings as the love of my family and the flock of Immanuel, I would be compelled to admit that my gratitude and love for them could excel still more. Yet, what faith I have and whatever love I have for the Lord and others in my life, I have by the grace of God, however poorly I have exercised His marvelous gifts. And I delight in the sure hope and approaching experience of the perfection of love even in me.
Let me then, whether I have an hour or several decades yet to live, grow in my grateful apprehension of God’s love for me and in my sincere love for others.
Yours with regrets and with prevailing rejoicing,
William Harrell
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Sunday
Morning Worship 10:30 AM
Evening Worship
6:30 PM
Wednesday
Christian Education
7:00 PM
Saturday
Congregational Prayer Meeting
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